Why Do Executive Functioning Skills Matter for Admissions
- By Carolyn Means
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- 06 Apr, 2018
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When I was making a presentation to parents at ConocoPhillips recently, I asked for a show of hands of those parents who knew about "Executive Functioning Skills". One hand went up. Definitely, this is a topic that I thought was widely understood by parents but it must be just in my world of private school education. We need to change that because developing executive functioning skills - or EF skills - in children is an essential responsibility for parents today. Many EF skills are most evident when they are missing - like the space where a front tooth used to be. Just as every one can tell when a child has lost a front tooth, everyone can tell when a child has lost self-control in the grocery store, at a birthday party or in the classroom.
Educational research shows that the number one executive functioning skill a child must have in order to learn is Emotional Regulation. This skill begins in the baby's crib and is fostered by loving parents who know that unless their child is hungry, wet or in pain, it is best to let the child cry when she is put down at bedtime. The child learns the power of soothing herself to sleep and not relying on a caregiver to do it for her. Likewise, when a child begins to melt down over a small disappointment, parents need to let the child experience sadness and move on or go to his room until he can calm himself.
One of my favorite books about teaching executive functioning skills to your children is Mind in the Making: The Seven Essential Life Skills Every Child Needs by Ellen Galinsky.
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After all of the hard work of getting our students back into school and establishing a new normal under the cloud of the virus, we find our schools once again in the throes of indecision regarding in-school or virtual school learning. The argument against masks on preschoolers seems doomed to fail, so millions of little children will never know what their first teacher's face looked like, and teachers will not know what emotions were hiding under those smiley-face masks. The largest body of research among psychologists today is said to be on the subject of anxiety . I do not doubt it. I see fewer carefree and happy children these days than in years past. Four and five-year olds seem to have lost the spontaneity of childhood, the ready laughter and childlike wonder. They do not engage readily in play, and they seem to have acquired much less knowledge than their same age peers in prior years. Of course, my observations are not at all scientific, but they do correlate with current literature. So I urge parents to do all they can to stimulate their children by playing games, reading books that promote laughter and finding time to just be silly. There certainly is no time for that in school with social distancing. Three books I read some years ago come to mind: Einstein Never Used Flashcards, The Importance of Being Little and Becoming Brilliant offer parents the latest research on early childhood learning and ways to engage the mind and heart of the young child. Old truths are back in vogue: "The brain learns through play," and, "Learning is a social activity". If children can't play and be social at school, then they need to have this environment as much as possible at home. Look for ways to introduce fun and stay away from flashcards and worksheets. Family games teach strategies and vocabulary and number sense while having fun and building relationships. And these don't require face masks.